As most of you know I have been on a medical weight loss. I haven’t been blogging much because I have been busy getting on plan. I am happy to report that I am down 9lbs. Now I wish this blog was all happy and upbeat but I want to really let you into my journey all of it not just the happy and fun parts.
As happy as I am that I’m down 9 lbs I still have the negative inner dialogue going on some days. Actually if we are going to be honest most days the negative inner dialogue is going on. As someone who has tried multiple weight loss programs I am sorta waiting for the shoe to drop as they say. I am dreading the day where I completely fall off the wagon. I have had some slip ups but not as bad as they use to be. I fear that my dialogue will lead me to fall off the journey. To give up and start gaining weight again. I’m afraid that one day I will decide that the weight isn’t coming off fast enough for the work I am doing.
But then I also have the little voice in my head that says. You are doing this! You are worth it! No you haven’t lost as much weight as you would have liked to by now but you also didn’t want to gain a bunch of weight either. You can and you will follow thru on your promise to fight to lose the weight so that you can avoid having surgery. If you do need surgery we will deal with it then.
Weight loss and healthy eating for me is going to be a daily battle for the rest of my life. I will always have to count my calories and be aware of what I am putting into my body. I will always have to deal with these mind games that I play with myself. But if I stick thru with the program I will learn to love my new lifestyle.
I recently had to start drinking two meal replacement shakes a day. Now I have done a few shakes before so I wasn’t sure if I was going to like them or not. But as I mentioned in my last post I was going to give this program everything I had and that included drinking the meal replacements. Today on Wednesday May 13th I can say that I am enjoying the shakes. But if you had asked me on Saturday I would have told you they are the most awful thing I have ever had to drink in my whole life. So what’s changed? Well I have the shakes are still the exact same composition they were on Saturday but I am different. My taste are changing because I no longer have tons of sugar, salt and greasy foods in my diet. If I want something sweet I have a piece of fruit or some greek yogurt with frozen berries. My taste buds have adjusted this fast it is insane.
Another big change I’ve noticed is my skin. I have always had issues with my skin being blotchy and full of blemishes but in just a few days my skin is clear and it looks so much healthier. It’s like there’s the beginning of a glow. I’m still pale but summer is coming I’m sure the sun will help me with that.
I’ve wanted to blog so many times recently but I couldn’t seem to put my thoughts to words that made sense. And when I did think I could make sense of everything something came up with the kids or I had an appointment but I am here now.
I started the new weight loss plan and although I cannot go into specific details I have been given the ok to tell my story just not share others.
I have been terrified of starting this diet. I was afraid I was going to be hungry, fail or just plain give up. I was also afraid that I would have massive headaches and not be able to function. But on Saturday I took the plunge and just decided that I was going to do this. I was going to give it my all and the hard work has paid off. Before I tell you my results so far let me tell you a little about the diet.
So as I mentioned this is a medical weight loss program and not something that everyone can participate in or should. I am in phase 1 of three. In phase one you are allowed 1000-1200 calories a day. You have two meal replacements and a lean cuisine type meal for supper and two snacks a day that’s it. Oh and some PGX granules to keep you full and satisfied. I only put mine on my supper since I haven’t experienced any hunger yet. Now I know some people are going to freak out when they read that I am only eating 1000 calories but please remember I am being closely supervised by an obesity specialist and he has done his homework to make sure that this is safe for his patients.
Now the good part. I have been following my diet to a T since Saturday and I am officially down 5 lbs today. The weight loss won’t always be this dramatic but for right now I will take it.
I’ve had a few people ask me what I eat in a day so I will give you a sample menu of what I’m eating and keep updating you as I go thru the program.
Breakfast: meal replacement shake
Snack: cheese string and apple
Lunch: meal replacement shake
Snack: spinach, cucumber, almonds, lemon poppy seed dressing
Supper: PC blue menu Italian Lasagna with pgx granules sprinkled on top.
And lots of water
I have to say I haven’t felt deprived at all so far on this diet. I am eating at regular intervals and I am eating quality food. In fact yesterday I went to a potluck event that had a free sundae bar and I didn’t have any. In fact I didn’t eat any of the food at the potluck I portioned my own food and brought it with me. I am tired of losing and gaining the weight. And this is my last chance before surgery so I will give it my all.
As you may have noticed I haven’t been posting much lately. And honestly I’m not hiding I’m just finding the life balance a little challenging lately. I wear many different hats around the house and sometimes I tend to forget to put on my blogger hat at the the end of the day. But I’m here now so lets do an update 🙂
I was hoping to share some of my experience with you about the weight loss program I’m participating in but sadly I won’t be able to. There are several group discussions and meetings that happen and they have asked us to sign a non disclosure. I will share my weight loss successes with you and my up’s and downs just can’t tell you what’s going on in the program.
Since the last time I blogged I am down 3 lbs. I’m so so happy that the weight is coming off again and I’m not feeling hungry or deprived. We have all been sick this past week so the gym has been something that has been put on the back burner. But now that we are all on the mend I will be getting back to my workouts. Now if only I could get rid of the mommy guilt when I go to the gym that would be fantastic.